I studied and ministered as an associate pastor for 15 years, including a theological program at the age of 26 and studying abroad. Then, in May 2009, through the Lord's providence, He was allowed to lead a solo ministry along with pioneering. For 14 years, I had my own training time through various trials and errors. I think the greatest benefit of this ministry was to have a deeper relationship with the Lord. 

  I believe the turning point in my ministry came about five years ago, especially after a time of hardship and adversity, when I felt like a cabbage being salted. I think the key to that point is prayer, and talking to the Lord. There are many realizations, but I'll share a recent one.

  Last Sunday, I received word that my oldest son in Australia was riding the loneliness of living away from home alone. As Monday progressed, that and two other issues compounded to keep me awake at night. The impact spilled over into my early morning prayers the next day, Tuesday, December 19. I was in a hurry, and my gratitude journaling and meditating on the Word felt unnatural. Fortunately, I was able to recognize when I was getting lost in my thoughts, so I went straight to my seat of prayer.

  However, unlike my usual prayer, I put my head down on the couch-style chair under the cross on the pulpit. Naturally, my shoulders and hands were also raised above the chair, and the clasp of my hands joined together. For there is something learned from past experiences. I wanted to quickly turn it over to the Lord because I couldn't do anything about it. However, after praying for about 30 minutes, I felt severe pain in both shoulders. I felt as if I were a Christian who was carrying a heavy burden.

  The Holy Spirit of Wisdom informed me. I had been overwhelmed with desire, and I had put my will into the prayer as if I were crying out to the Lord. The weight of my desire was on my shoulders. So I went straight to my usual position, on my knees, and spent some time in supplication. "Only by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known," so I did. Another 30 minutes passed, and this time the news came from my knees: I was feeling unusually painful and numb.

  That's right. I was still willing to pray to my knees. In the first place, the benefit of kneeling prayer is that the Lord goes before me because I cannot walk. By grace, I immediately realized this and changed my posture. Slowly, I changed to a cross-legged position with my buttocks on the floor. I also changed the way I prayed. "Lord, I am helpless, I can't do anything, so do your will. Tell me what I should do." As I prayed, the heavy burden and pain on my shoulders and knees seemed to disappear through my cushioned buttocks. Rest and peace came to my soul, and I boasted in the Lord's power to be strong when I was weak.